TheRetroCritic

Long before Johnny Depp ever entered that chocolate factory with the silliest haircut in town, Gene Wilder had already led a bunch of brats to their untimely, chocolatey demise. And as much as I enjoyed Tim Burton's modern take on Roald Dahl's timeless story, this original version is simply unbeatable. While not completely faithful to the book, Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory still ticks all the right boxes and captures the spirit of the story perfectly whereas the later re-imagining lacked genuine charm, which this one has tons of. Charlie is played by a geeky but convincing Peter Ostrum who manages to break your heart more than once over the course of the film. Gene Wilder, of course, is Willy Wonka and steals the show effortlessly right from under everyone's noses. From the get-go he is the character and you can't wait to go on this surreal adventure with him. He even gets a song which, his singing voice being... what it is, isn't too vocally impress

Tim Burton's own short Frankenweenie certainly had potential so a remake sounded good but risky. After all, Burton is being criticized these days for doing the same type of thing over and over and his work gets it in the neck for lacking originality altogether so an adaptation of his own short was always going to provoke critics. Not this time, though. Dark Shadows was enjoyable enough but there really wasn't that much to it, Alice In Wonderland did really well at the box-office but the feedback wasn't exactly positive. Well, it's Disney time again and, believe it or not, they finally got it right! And the irony is they got it right with a film based on a short they rejected back in the day for being too dark. If anything, this slick new stop-motion Frankenweenie is darker and infinitely more twisted than its low-budget little brother. Burton has assembled a vintage Burton cast this time with the likes of Martin Short ( Mars Attacks! ), Catherine O'Hara ( B

Back when Tim Burton films were still awesome and not "just ok", Mars Attacks! came out and gave us a delightful piece of 50's-style sci-fi B movie goodness complete with a stellar cast and Burton's own brand of surreal, nasty wackiness. It's funny to think that Independence Day came out the same year as Mars Attacks! since the latter feels like a complete spoof of Roland Emmerich's disaster cheese-fest. Burton's film takes the clichéd alien invasion formula we've seen in movies like War Of The Worlds , Earth vs The Flying Saucers or The Day The Earth Stood Still and gives it a playful edge. We see our world react to a potential alien encounter stupidly and naively. Rather than fearing the Martians, we're in fact pretty darn welcoming and peaceful about the whole thing. It's a clever take on that plot because in those old movies people are usually terrified of an alien invasion and completely overreact. Here, we only acknowledge how scre

I just thought I'd post this little gem, since I'm The RetroCritic and all...

Checked out the LFCC preview tonight, just thought I'd "Batmobile" you guys. Man I love that car... Yes, that is Dr Who walking around next to The Bat's vehicle: He wouldn't last a DAY in Gotham lol

Johnny Deep is "Worst Director Of All Time" Edward D. Wood Jr. in this stylish Tim Burton biopic/hommage which looks at the man's rise to... making Plan 9 From Outer Space , his biggest and "best" movie, and his friendship with ageing icon Bela Lugosi. How much of the movie is based on facts is hard to say, parts of it are clearly anecdotal, others feel put on for the sake of the narrative or character development. Did Ed Wood really help Bela Lugosi check into rehab? Possibly. Did he ever bump into Orson Welles in a bar and have a deep conversation with him? Probably not. It doesn't matter though, this isn't so much about presenting an accurate depiction of Wood's personal life as it is celebrating the guy's passionate drive for what he does (or at least tries to do) and his quirky-ass career. Was he deluded? Perhaps. His films were certainly not well made. But this is a guy who went through hell trying to make his trashy sci-fi monster mo

Further proof that the Depp/Burton formula CAN work beyond Edward Scissorhands and Ed Wood , Sleepy Hollow sees the tale of the Headless Horseman being told through a Hammer horror-style flick complete with a creepy forest, dodgy townspeople, witches, curses and a cowardly prim-and-proper lead. Depp is Ichabod Crane, a character usually depicted as butt-ugly but this time... not so, the science-minded investigator from New York who finds himself looking for logic in the small town of Sleepy Hollow when strange head-choppin' murders start mysteriously taking place. Soon enough, a skeptical Crane finally gives in to the idea of a headless horseman and adapts to the supernatural in order to find who really is behind all this. As straight-forward as it sounds, this is one surprisingly complex plot so you'll have to pay attention if you're going to even get the 'Scooby Doo' reveal at the end. This is Tim Burton still at his most creative and although I've sai

Tim Burton being the movie wizard of my childhood, people who know me at all will know that I’m somewhat biased when it comes to Burton’s films but that said, I will attempt to objectively review this one fairly and without any emo fanboy nonsense. Then again… Dark Shadows was wicked cool you guys!!! I’m kidding, it was fine. As trendy as it is these days to pan anything Mr Burton does, sadly this review won't. I mean, granted his movies post- Mars Attacks haven’t really reached the heights of his earlier works but a so-so Tim Burton movie tends to still be way more fun than most other films of that type and Dark Shadows is no exception. Actually, there aren’t many movies of that type making this the most original Burton film in years. The mix of overdramatic soap opera and Hammer-style horror is rare but works brilliantly here. Watch as vampires and witches worry about their seafood businesses in an unknown shitty little town. Seafood lol Actually,

When Tim Burton re-invented the Dark Knight back in the 80's he took some aspects which made the original Adam West TV series fun but added a moody-looking Gotham City and treated the DC hero seriously, almost like a detective from an old film noir thriller. The goofy kid-friendly humour was replaced by Burton's trademark darkly comic tone and what we got was one action-packed, stylish, unique, funny, clever blockbuster and one of the best comic book movie adaptations ever. The sequel, Batman Returns , "Burtonised" the concept to the max giving Batman a more gothic setting, a disgusting villain, a sexier, troubled love interest, Pee-Wee Herman, a circus gang, Christopher Walken and a penguin army. It was great: darker, snowier, Christmassier, Burtonier. It remains my favourite to this day. Then came Joel Schumacher's turn in the director's chair... We all know how that turned out in the end but looking at Batman Forever today: it's honestly not bad.

Excited about Dark Shadows ? I am! Then again it's in my DNA to flock to Tim Burton movies regardless of what they are so... Groovy posters! Heeeere's Johnny... Eva Green looking fab... Cool ghost lady... Hit Girl putting the "cool" in... Dark Shadows... A Burton graduate back for more strangeness... And last but not least Mrs Burton herself. Yes, she is in this. Crazier things have happened. Anyway, movie looks fun, lets hope it is! More posters available on the Empire website.

Yes, the trailer is finally here and BOY is it wacky! Click on the new poster to watch :) So not the gothic drama I thought they were gonna go for lol What do you guys think?

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetle... ASS! Man, talk about not even trying... what a poor excuse for a Beetlejuice game we got. This is the kind of NES title we bought and after about 5 minutes playing it realised we'd made a horrible mistake but were too poor, lazy or stubborn to do something about it so we just sat there and tried our best to finish a game we resented from the start for being nothing like the movie and being barely playable to begin with. Hey, remember that scene in Beetlejuice when he comes across a giant shark-infested bathtub? Right? And remember those upside down umbrellas shooting laser beams and how Beetlejuice really got hurt every time he would touch a fiery torch? Of course you don't. That's some LJN bullshit right there. Now I'm not saying that movie-based video games should follow the original films to the letter but making up random shit just to make a speedy game release less of a hassle is just not good enough. It's like that

Some new pics from Tim Burton's upcoming Dark Shadows have recently popped up online: lol Eva Green, Michelle Pfeiffer and Helena Bonham Carter looking very suspicious indeed.

Need I say more?